Saturday, March 31, 2007

WTF It's another Caturday!

Cat goes scuba diving.

So, it's been a short week, only being at work for 60 hours instead of the usual 70-80. We've got lots of new EMT's at the ambulance, so it's taken a load off of me. I did take a crazy woman to Kankakee this week. She called me a stupid fuck. I told her to be nice since I was driving. The woman who rode with her is a retired prison guard and a 3rd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do. The woman started blowing her some static and when my partner said what she did the woman shut up for the rest of the trip. I think "Speedy" told her about breaking some inmates arm once. It turned out to be a nice quiet drive through the country.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

And, it's a DOUBLE POST WEDNESDAY!

I just came across this on a message board. It's a live webcam, with sound, of a watering hole in Africa. I've been watching it off and on for an hour or so, and I've seen 2 hyenas and a snake. It's definitely worth checking out, but remember that it's halfway around the world for us...

OMG here's the link!

So one of my nephew's friends got busted shoplifting...

and it reminded me of a joke I saw on LUE.

A mother passing by her daughter's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, "Mom." With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Mom: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I've been finding real passion with Ahmed and he is so nice-even with all his piercings, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion Mom, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy. He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too. Ahmed taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Ahmed can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grand children.

Your daughter, Judith

PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

The president of Iran has his own blog...and it's a new Caturday!



Extra the kitten is born with 26 toes.


Now, on to the blog.


Link here

It's....interesting. I'm not really sure how to take this guy. He claimed that the Holocaust didn't happen, wants to nuke Israel, but at the same time I've got some strange kind of respect for the guy. The most recent post is a good read. It's a response to a letter from a woman here in the US.

If it pops up in Arabic, then check under his picture on the top right for an English link (or French or Persian).

*waves to the Homeland Security agent reading my blog now that I've linked to a terrorist website*

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Chimp and Gab slaughter some pigs. Meat is good.


powered by ODEO

I wish I could remember what all we talked about, but I do know that a good amount of time was spent on pig slaughter. Bacon is far tastier than Vegemite. Even vegetarians and carnivores can agree to that.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Chuck E. Cheese, where a dad can be a kid.

I love Chuck E. Cheese. Seriously. When I was a youngster, I can only remember going there once. It sucked too, because my prents only sent me with a few dollars, so I spent most of the day watching other kids play their games. I do remember that I got enough tickets to get a plastic paratrooper toy, with a slingshot to launch him in the air.

So I took Mazzy there today for a little father/daughter time. She had a gift card that she turned into tokens, and I got a handful myself. We played a ton of games: air hockey, skee-ball, and what not. The arcade games at our store kind of suck. The Star Wars pod racer game always wants to veer left, and the Jurassic park shooter bounces and jerks so much that one gets thrown from the seat if they're not planted well. There is a cool mini-kart racer that's fun to play. Lots of nice courses and it's actually a challenge to drive properly.

Mazzy beat me in air hockey, but I won on the duck gallery so we called it even. She ended up with 110 tickets for the day. She bought a mini-bubble set, a ring, and got a ring and a toy snake for her brother. She even got a new Chuck E. cup for Roto.

All in all, it was a good time. There were some stressful moments, like the white trash broad letting her baby crawl on the skee-ball lane next to the one we were playing on. That damn brat kept getting over into Mazzy's lane. I almost wished that she'd hit it. There was also this one girl wearing a crown who pushed in front of Mazzy on one of the rides. "It's my brithday and I get to ride this now" she said. Mazzy looked at me and I just shrugged. Mazz said that someone that mean wouldn't be her friend. O_o

Anyway, back to work now. Blogging from work FTW!

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Humpday, dontcha know?

300 comes out this weekend.

Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright have a new flick coming out soon, Hot Fuzz.

Eating in space can kill you. (RIP Jek Porkins)

The 2008 presidential campaigns are in full swing now. I kind of wish Howard Dean was running again, I miss him.

X-Men issue #200 is coming out with a very sexy cover.

And speaking of comics, one of America's finest heros passed away this week.

And another great hero's tomb was possibly found.

And finally, I got a haircut. Happy humpday!

Monday, March 05, 2007

Can you name all 50 states in 10 minutes?

If you click the link, the time starts right away, so be ready. Spelling counts.

CLICK HERE IF YOU'RE READY!

I got 47, not too bad.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

A funny EMT story.

We had a high school student the other day as a ride along for their class time. I had just settled in for my nap when the pagers went off.

"Duffy Ambulance, ambulance needed at blahblahblah St. for a 65 year old female unresponsive but breathing."

So we all hop in the ambulance and take off. The student is in back giggling, but I ignore it. We get to the scene and everything is fine. The woman fainted, but really had nothing else wrong with her. We took her to the ER anyway. As I was filling out the paperwork, my partner asked her what the joke was.

"I thought the page said 'butt-breathing'."

Now I'll never get that out of my head.